passive girls and active boys

My son brought these books home last week from the school library.  I was pretty proud of him for choosing two completely different types of book so I took this photo.  The plan was to upload it and talk about how he had chosen a book about a boy and MORE importantly a GIRL who go on adventures, and also a book about a tea party involving dolls.  I was really excited that he had chosen what I assumed to be a book about a girl who goes on adventures with a male companion and battles dragons.  I also thought it was cool that he wanted to get a book about dolls since he is in a classroom with all boys and many of them are three grades above him.

Anyway, the problem with this ended up being that the doll book was exactly what you'd expect but the Dragon book was infuriating.  If I had paid closer attention to the cover of Dragon Scales I might have noticed that while it sort of looks like the kids are both playing together, that is the opposite of true.  Throughout the book the siblings walk about their little play area/forest and the boy battles dragons and sees pirates while the girl picks flowers and leaves.  WHAT?  I was super disappointed, not that there's anything wrong with collecting nature but I was expecting a nice book with two good characters and I get a girl walking around picking up leaves while her brother is being active.  I guess at least she got out of the house?

This brings me to something else I've wanted to talk about. Disney Princesses.  I am really looking forward to Brave and I hope that in the end it's as awesome as it looks like it will be.  I enjoyed Tangled because at least they gave Rapunzel a frying pan and let her rescue him but I think Brave looks more my speed.  I was never one of those girls who played "Princess" or "wedding".  In fact I have never in my life had any desire to be a Princess, that would be so constraining.  I wanted to go to the courthouse instead of having a wedding because well, I'm just that kind of girl.

Growing up my favorite characters were all female and they were all independent in their own way.  I didn't play Disney Princess, I played Alice...the girl who gets transported into another world and goes it alone.  She doesn't stick with any of the weirdos that she comes along who give her varying degrees of help or trickery.

I played Dorothy, and while you could argue that she has 3 male companions, she doesn't ask to.  They ask where she is going and want to tag along, and she lets them.  Dorothy is the leader of the group and in the end she's the one who gets shit done (although unintentionally).  I always liked that she was doing something nice by attempting to throw water on her new friend who had been set on fire by the witch and ultimately it's an act of kindness that kills the villain.  Dorothy never set out to hurt anyone and being a good person got her where she needed to go.

Lastly, I played Peter Pan a lot and I liked Wendy.  Wendy ultimately decides that she wants to go back home.  She isn't going to throw away absolutely everything that she has known for a cute boy and the promise of never growing old. I also felt like by going home she was choosing her childhood over being a parent, the Lost Boys wanted her to be their mother and take care of them.  She considered it but ultimately she knew that even if she had to "move out of the nursery" like her parents said that she would still get to be a child for a little while longer if she returned home.

I'm not going to lie, I'm still looking for my shadow, and I still have a lot of growing up to do.  I just roll with it and hope for the best.  I'm just like everyone else, trying to figure it out and make the best of what happens.  To quote one of my favorite TV shows...

"We like to think we're so smart, that we have all the answers. And we want to pass that on to our children. But if you scratch beneath the surface, you won't have to dig deep to find the kid you were, which is why it's kind of crazy that we're raising kids of our own. I guess that's the real circle of life. Your parents faked their way through it. You fake your way through it. And you just hope you didn't raise a serial killer." - Phil Dunphy