Tuesday, March 26, 2013

but the Dark Side has all the cookies!!!

You might remember this post and this one, today I'm here to tell you anther one.  Today I was sitting on the couch with Alden and we were playing with his iPad (specifically teaching him to care for his new Tamagotchi) and there was a knock on the door.  I wasn't expecting company but I got up to peek out the window.  A gray van.
Sidebar: Why are they always in vans? Does Jesus prefer them or something?
I don't know anyone who drives a gray van (as far as I know) so I tried to discreetly peer out the window beside the door.  All I see is someone bent over wearing a really long wool coat. Thinking this is really strange/creepy I tell Alden to "be quiet".  My initial thought for some reason was not "IT IS EASTER WEEK AND THIS IS ABOUT THE LORD" but "this person is coming to shoot/rob me, so of course I open the door like a dummy.  I opened the door just a crack and I had my left hand on my baseball bat ready to grab swing if need be.  

I look up and there is a little old man, probably in his 70s.  He is wearing the aforementioned long black wool coat, a button up shirt, and a black bowler hat.  He looked dapper, he looked British, and he looked like he probably wasn't going to murder me or rob me.  That's when I realized he was going to attempt to evangelize me.  I want to point out that he was the nicest Bible Thumper that's ever come to my door.  He was very friendly and not in the least pushy or even interested in having a debate or discussion. He just genuinely wanted to invite me to his church's events over the course of the week.  Then he handed me this...
Which in itself is not funny.  Unless you have seen this,  which I had, only a few weeks ago on the web.

It took absolutely EVERYTHING I HAD IN ME NOT TO LAUGH IN THIS OLD MAN'S FACE.  I was really proud of myself for being able to hold it in and just smile while he told me that "all the races are represented at the bottom of this photo because Christ our Lord loves everyone. People of all races are invited to these events because we too love everyone."   

I thought about pointing out that Jesus' appearance was never described in the bible and that his race was also up for debate.  I also wanted to ask why Jesus didn't have his usual hippie hair.  But like I said he was just an old nice man and I was just seriously trying hold it together and not laugh while imagining the future of this photo, in which I draw Obi's blue lightsaber in his hand & put it on my fridge.

Anyway, I did a lot of smiling and nodding and he told me to "have a lovely day" and he left.

In conclusion if anyone wants to go to a Star Wars party, I think they are having one in my neck of the woods tonight. I assume they are going to watch all 6 movies and then have a discussion.  There will be a nice old man there probably wearing his bowler hat.  I bet his favorite character is Jar-Jar Binks because he always gets left out.  

And now I'm gonna go eat Girl Scout cookies.
*because I'm from the dark side*

Tuesday, March 19, 2013

school's not out for summer...

I registered for my Summer and Fall courses yesterday.  I also switched from a diploma program to a degree program.  I ended up having to take a bunch of math because frankly I suck at math and so it's probably going to take about a year to finish up.  Before you tell me you are awesome at math/a math teacher/a motherfucking numeric sorcerer, let me explain that I have been tutored pretty constantly in math my entire existence and I don't get it.  I actually have two learning disabilities, dyslexia and dyscalculia.  I had lots of help overcoming my dyslexia because if was apparent from a young age.  For instance I was mirror writing, so there was an obvious problem, we addressed it, and now I feel like I have a pretty decent grasp on reading and writing.  However, the dyscalculia was something I had never heard of until a friend suggested I might have it after explaining my severe struggles with math, money management, telling time on an analog clock, and anything involving numbers in general.  So there is an actual medical reason that I don't "get" math. Blah blah blah, I'm stuck in dumb dumb math for a bit.  I'll get through it eventually.

So for summer I'm taking
Math 98
Composition and Rhetoric
Web Graphics I

Which reminds me, if anyone has a copy of Adobe Photoshop CS6 they don't mind parting with, please let me know.  I don't really have $600 to shell out for the entire program but I also absolutely have to have it for summer & fall. (Plus, you know, $600 more dollars for the insanely overpriced books for the classes).

All my summer classes are online so that I won't have to juggle finding a ride to and from school and a sitter for Alden.  So it's awesome that it worked out that way.  In the fall I'll have to go for 2 and the other 2 will be online. Hopefully, I'll have a car that's running properly and a license by then, I guess we'll see...

In Fall I'm taking
Math 99
Web Graphics II
Sociology 
C#

So that's what I'll be up to the next two semesters.

After that I will have
College Algebra
Web Development II
Music Appreciation 
and an Internship

Then I SHOULD be finished.  So YAY for that!

I didn't get sucked up in the storm yesterday, but I want to thank everyone who was calling/texting/tweeting/etc at me to make sure I was not blown to the land of Oz.

Today I filled out my first Nielson TV survey, I guess if it's interesting enough they'll send me more?  If they are wanting "things I actually watch on TV when they are on TV" they are going to be sorely disappointed, because I watch a whopping ONE TV show a week when it's on TV.  If they watching count TV 'online' then they are in for a serious treat because I watch ALL THE THINGS (that don't suck).

Anyway so far so good this week.  Next week is Weeman's spring break and mine is the week after that so we're going to have to find something fun to get into.

Everyone have a lovely rest of the week!

Tuesday, March 5, 2013

I've decided to become a professional student...



I've pretty well talked myself into staying in school to get my associates of applied science degree specializing in IT Specialist/Web Design. Right now I'm in the diploma program for the same thing so everything will transfer. I'm having a hard time deciding about some of these electives though and I'd love some input.

These are the CIST options and I have to chose one:
Visual Basic I
C# Programming
PHP Programming
Java Programming
Mobile App Development
Web App Programming
OpenSource Web App Programming
Interactive & Social App Programming

The problem is that I am really not that interested in app programming. I would rather do one of the languages, but is that the right thing to do? It feels like everything is moving into an app based direction. Would I be stupid to pass those up to take something old school like Basic?

The Arts electives I have to chose from are
Art Appreciation
American Literature
Intro To Humanities
Music Appreciation

I am leaning toward music appreciation because I've gotten to where I don't really listen to music much anymore and when I do it's all 90s & 70s. While I don't think there's anything WRONG with that (especially since everything on the radio is crap) I feel like maybe it would help me branch out a little bit.

The Social/Behavior Sciences electives I have to choose from are:
Principles of Economics
Principles of Macroeconomics
Principles of Microeconomics
World History I
World History II
U.S. History I
U.S. History II
American Government
Introductory Psychology
Intro to Sociology

Obviously I am leaning toward the last two because the others all sound like hell on earth. I have a slight bias to Sociology but basically everyone has said I'd have more fun in Psych.

HELP ME?